In my life as I am sure in your life as well you have come across all sorts of people with different personalities and ways of being. I guess in a way that is what makes all of us special the fact that no two people are exactly the same.
We are indeed unique, but we tend to forget this. We tend to forget that we are already whole and complete, and instead of acting and coming from who we truly are, our Higher Self, most people come from their ego/persona.
The ego is that part of our psyche in our conscious mind that we call the “I”‘ it is our identity. The function of the ego is survival. When we come from ego we come from fear, from judgment, from limitation, from lack, from survival, from our story, our conditioning, etc…. I am sure you get the picture.
The ego develops a persona to act in the world. We can think of the persona as our identity; the mask that we show to the world. We all have a persona it is part of being human, we all have an ego and will continue to have one for the rest of our lives, but the key is to be mindful about who is ruling your life. Is the ego ruling your life or is the Higher Self ruling your life?
This leads me to talk about why we defend ourselves. Have you ever asked yourself this question? I can think of someone in specific that I know who always seems to be in a defensive mode. I sometimes find myself being fearful of making any comments in front of this person because I do not know how she is going to take them, whether she is going to misinterpret them, and become defensive.
I also have had the opposite experience when dealing with people and can think of a past colleague who always appeared to be in a state of bliss and Zen, and just being in her presence was like entering paradise. She is a very easy going person who seems to take everything in a very light manner.
Both of these people are very good people even if their personas are completely different. So why would one person live in defensive mode while another one doesn’t? Well since we are talking about human beings the truth is there can be multiple answers to this question.
For the purpose of this blog I will focus on one main reason, and that is that whether it is consciously or unconsciously, most human beings come from defensive mode when they feel that there is a threat. Whether the threat is real or perceived; and you can think of the word threat metaphorically speaking, as the ego feeling threatened.
So what is the difference between the two people that I briefly discussed? The main difference is that one stands in her power and the other one doesn’t. One knows the truth of her being and the other has forgotten the truth of her being, and feels that she has to always be on guard, so that she does not get hurt.
Only the ego feels that it needs to be on guard and put up its defenses; while the Higher Self knows the truth of her being, and it’s able to stand in her power.
It of course does not mean that there are not going to be times when there may be a need to set boundaries, etc., but the difference will be in whether you are coming from ego (survival) or whether you are coming from your Higher Self (standing in your power).
When you come from your Higher Self vs. your ego you learn to recognize that the world is not against you, you learn to not take things personally because you learn that most people are not doing things to personally get you, and you learn to differentiate between having to defend yourself vs. being in your power.
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